Hey Beautiful People! Hope you’re having a great start to your week. You know I’m all about self-discovery and journeying through so, I had to share what happened to me! Over the weekend, while washing dishes, I had one of those solitary epiphanies that had me a little shook in these streets.
While plucking and scrubbing plates (haha), I was thinking about my future. You know basic things like all that I seek to be to the world, the legacy I want to leave for my children, the imprint I want to make on others, the person I need to be for me. For the sake of this conversation, the most important question I asked myself was why haven’t I become her yet? ( Yea, I get real deep when I’m alone with my thoughts.) Then it hit me.
Fear. Fear has been my the thief of progression.
Wait a minute now. I’m not afraid of many things but, if I’m honest; I can remember times fear has stopped me dead in my tracks and has left me stagnant for longer than I’d like to admit, all because I was scared to face the unknown. I mean, blindly walking into those first time situations can be very exciting when the thrill is appealing like riding rollercoasters and taking international trips because we just know their beaches are better and the sun shines brighter. But, what about those real life obstacles where you’re extremely unfamiliar with the journey and insecure of the outcome? Let’s talk about that type of fear.
While working on the pots, I came to the conclusion that type of fear just has to be faced. “Obviously, Staci.” No, but really, get all up in fears face. Not when you’re ready or when you have no other choice. Face that-kind-of debilitating fear when it presents itself so, you can continue on your journey. Easier said than done, I know. Try to remember on the other side of that type of fear is knowledge and a big fat release.
Once you make the choice to face your fears, you make the choice to overcome. That is exactly what you will do. You will walk through the journey and deal with whatever is on the other side. Once you’re there, you now have the know-how to proceed, furthering you along. Then, you release. You release the tension, the anxiety and most importantly, that God forsaken “fear.”
You will say to yourself “Congratulations, you have defeated fear. You didn’t allow what was in front of you to stop you this time. So, you won’t let it stop you next.” In that moment, you’ll take another step and realize you’re back on your path. Back at the journey. You’re back to progression of your life.
Washing my last fork is when I realized how much fear had stopped me in the past, how much further I may have been if I stepped out more on faith. But I’m grateful I get to learn from my experience and vow my future will be different. And then I cleaned out the sink, dried my hands and walked out of the kitchen, b-lining to answer the email I didn’t know how to respond to for weeks and make the phone call I’ve been dreading for days.
What do you know? I’m alive to tell. Did I have to write an entire blog post about something we already know we should do? Something as simple as “face your fears?”
Yes. It took me looking at what’s holding me back to view “fear” differently. I no longer see it as something frivilous but rather one of those life obstacles that I have to deal with over and over again until, its so common in my life its almost weightless, in a sense. Kinda like my relationship with drinking water and eating vegetables.
When I was a kid, drinking water was basically non-existent unless I was forced to or dying of thirst. As an adult, I had to find creative and intentional ways to implement more water intake. I’ve been intentional about it for so long now, I drink more water than anything else. But ya girl still loves her Honest Tea.
Same with veggies. Hated all, still don’t like most. Let’s be real. But, I’m intentionally eating more of the ones that I do love and adding more of the ones I’d rather not taste to smoothies and such. Just so that I still get my intake. Hopefully, it will be like water one day. Weightless.
That’s what I am doing with fear. I am chasing it. I am intentionally aware of the goosebumps and walking in that same direction anyway. I do not want fear to hinder my progression anymore, for reasons they shouldn’t. So, I’m tapping into my faith walk and facing all sorts of life obstacles because my future self is depending on me.
I’m excited to see all I have done in the next few months and the progression I have made by conquering all of the things that used to stop me in my tracks due to fear of the unknown. Unknown about to be a whole bae, lol.
Who’s with me? I’d love to know what your relationship is with fear and how you choose to overcome to continue the necessary progression in your life? Drop a line below.
until next time,
— details —
Jacket: Eddie Bauer via Martha Black Vintage; similar here
Denim Shirt: H&M; similar here
Cropped Jeans: Gap (thrifted); similar here
Booties: Lucky Brand; similar here
4 Replies to “How I Choose To Overcome Fear”
Wow! This post was right on time! I resignate with most of the things you said. Its funny I was just telling myself why are you so afraid of change when you see change happen everyday all your life and your Grandmother, Mother, aunts, and sisters handled everything without breaking a sweat. ( i do go deep when im alone as well except i wasn’t doing dishes i was on that God awful Ferry ride back to the city). Ive been fearful the last two years of the unknown in my professional life, like can i handle a new job, am i qualified enough, do i really want to be the only black girl in the office 😕. Everyday for the last week I have been waking up telling myself to just live, everyday isn’t promised and you need to take more risk that benefit me.
I pray for all of our progressions. My mom say to me as Women we can handle
Anything but as Black Women we handle everything Gracefully.
Thank you so much for reading this blog post! Im so glad you were able to follow my ramblings and connect. Now you know you’re not alone on the fear (not to be confused with ferry) ride! But, the fact that you’re able to recognize what’s holding you back is a good thing. Now, let’s take it one step further and challenge yourself to step out on faith and act on those fears. Maybe send out job applications for those positions you’ve been secretly plotting on & when they call you, SAY YES! Also, write down a list of things you intentionally want to conquer. One by one, start knocking your list down. You’ve got this! Keep in touch. @cocoandclick
Yesssss! Are we the same person? I STRUGGLED (and still do) with drinking the recommended amount of water I needed. I do enjoy veggies tho, just not salad lol.
But fear has definitely been the thief of my progress as well. That and self doubt. I’ve been slowly but surely getting out of my own head and pursuing my passions! I cannot wait to watch your grow even more and progress!
Vera, we might be cousins! LOL The water thing takes time & for me, LOTS OF intent. haha. I hated the taste of water. So, I learned I prefer room temperature over cold and it’s easier for me to digest. PRO TIP: add lemon juice. You’ll be downing cups in no time!
Have you tried affirmations? I speak self love and assurance into your life daily and you’ll be out of your head in no time! Also, read my last post about confidence. It may help! Keep in touch on instagram! xo